Massively^™

I only play MMO's with my RL friends, and in the same room. I think that's why I like DDO so much. DDO REQUIRES voice chat to be effective (traps and such), so the couple of times we've raided and been in large groups it's worked out well, as a screaming 10 year old just can't handle that level of complexity. That's not saying 10 year olds don't play, they just don't raid.

I feel you though, when people are liabilities on your fun, it's a bummer.

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Nice post, but of course I have to take exception to a few points:

"Don't scream at a player just because he's not doing his job right -- try to help them out instead."

Totally agree with part 1, but part 2 gets dicey at times. There's little more annoying then someone trying to micro-manage how you're playing your character, no matter how well-intended they are. Granted there are some absolutes, but many parts of a game support more than 1 way of doing things, and your way is often not the only "right" way. Everyone is there to play a game and have fun, not to be a puppet on a string.

As an example, I was in a small guild in WOW and we did regular runs of some of the 5-man instances quite successfully. Then we had a new guy join the guild. He was from a high-end raiding guild, and he immediately took control and started telling the priest how to heal (he was a tank). Our priest, trying to be welcoming to the new guy, tried some of his suggestions. Suddenly these 5-man instances got a lot harder, and after we wiped a few times he announced that it was impossible to succeed with our healer, making her feel like crap (again, in spite of the fact that we'd had these instances down to a routine before he joined). Guild leader finally had to intercede and tell the newbie to calm down or find another guild.

He had been successful in his old guild with his old healer playing a certain way. We'd been successful with our healer playing a certain way. Both healers were playing the "right" way for them and their groups, even though they were apparently very different styles.

Next point:
"Laugh, talk, tell jokes, be social! There are few things worse than people who can't lighten up when playing a game."

That's really subjective and it depends again on who you're playing with. I don't mind a silent, capable party-mate. I really do mind the idiot cracking Chuck Norris jokes and jumping around constantly and telling Hilary Clinton jokes. I'm in the game to get away from the real world, thanks very much.

I'd suggest rather that you take your cues from the rest of the party. If they seem like they're 'being their character' then keep the jokes to a minimum, or at least within the context of the characters and gameworld. If they're all constantly referring to "their toon" then you're probably good to joke around about whatever you want.

Thanks for your series of posts, Colin. Always an interesting read.

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I'm gonna side with Colin on your two arguments GRT.

You get in a group where some "new guy" is trying to run the group, all you have to do is be frank with him, no need to get pissy man. it's a game. Say, "Hey, this is how we've been doing things. If you don't like them you're welcome to leave." That's helping him out, making him learn bullying in a group is not welcome. Don't treat people like crap when they're just thinking they're helping out. You always have the option not to group with someone.

The other point where you try to counter Colin saying "Laugh, talk tell jokes and be social" is subjective. It is exactly that, subjective. You can't be subjective playing a game anymore? Yeah I don't like grouping with people that have poor senses of humor either, so guess what? I don't. But what Colin is saying, that when you open your mouth and chat a little, you might find that your grouped with people who DO talk about interesting things, can seperate the game from real life, and add a little humor into things will make for a better playing experience.

Remember, you have the option not to group with anyone you don't want to. I can usually tell within 5 minutes joining or forming a group, the personality types within it and whether the group or certain players are worth adventuring with.

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well said.. well said....

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It's a good article, that. I am one of the many currently experiencing AoC: Over last weekend I've been fortunate enough to have landed in not one, not two, but three groups whose members I've pretty much all added to my list of friends. It might just be me, and I'm sure it's merely a matter of time, but I'm yet to meet a real idiot in my travels. The people I was grouping with were smart, intelligent, and forgiving, and we helped each other out a lot. Then we became carebears and shot colourful rays out of our stomach. =P

Given the more dynamic nature of healing in AoC, people are prone to be in either one of two camps: one wonders why the healer is standing so close to the melee, and urges them to step back; and the other realises that being a healer in AoC is a lot less about healbotting and a lot more about being the most physically active on the field of battle than anyone else. On-the-fly medic! =D

That said, it's always a great pleasure to find you have someone of a similar mindset in a group, and similar humour (with which I don't mean Chuck Norris Jokes & Co). Call me a pernickety bastard, but spelling is something I put a great deal of emphasis on, and if I can read what someone is trying to say without having to recourse to urbandictionary, then it's more likely I'll enjoy questing with them. The quality of communication, and how people react to departures from expected results, is a good gauge on how fun your group is.

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