Keeping the wife happy: Wrath style
by Shawn Schuster 
Nov 13th 2008 at 3:00PM
Filed under: World of Warcraft, Fantasy, Culture, Expansions, Warhammer Online
In a recent article over at Game Set Watch, Michael Walbridge takes a look at the inner dynamics of the family gaming habit. He tells an all-too-familiar story of one family member (in this case his wife) who wants nothing more than to play Wrath of the Lich King upon release, yet he has sworn off WoW for good, in lieu of Warhammer Online. When his wife finally realizes that swearing off WoW for good really means "for good" this time, it nearly brings her to tears. Will he give in and rejoin his wife at Wrath's launch? Will he continue with WAR, crushing his entire family dynamic? You'll have to check out the story to find out!
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Evi said on 4:19PM 11-13-2008
Before I read the article, I was thinking about this: a lot of my enjoyment of WoW comes from playing with my longtime boyfriend. I can see how the wife would be upset if the husband quit.
After reading the article, I'm a little creeped out. The husband is bitter about WoW, he's enjoying Warhammer and other games, and he really doesn't seem to want to return. Yeah, that's gonna turn out REAL well. He should have just put his foot down and firmly told his wife he was through with WoW. This is going to build so much resentment and bitterness in their relationship, it's not even funny. At this point, I'm just hoping his article exaggerated the sitauation.
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Abriael said on 5:26PM 11-13-2008
Honestly if that husband gives up a better game (Warhammer) to play an inferior one (WoW) just because his wife is bitching, he's a weakling.
It's honestly sad to see how wow owes part of it's success to this kind of crap and not to actual quality (in which it's quite lacking).
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Lemons said on 9:29PM 11-19-2008
You are quite insane aren't you?
marla said on 10:41AM 11-18-2008
Did anyone else think the way he described his wife was a bit creepy? As in, she sounded a bit bonkers.
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zappo said on 11:04AM 11-18-2008
Honestly the way this guy sounded, it seems like he's finally come to grips with the fact that the woman he married is in fact crazy. Seeing as I had that epiphany myself with like.. well nearly every girl I've dated (I seriously need to get a sane girl) I can relate a bit to that.
I'd give this marriage a 10% chance it's going to go over 3 years.
clutterskull said on 12:51PM 11-18-2008
If you haven't been there you wouldn't know, and it's insulting and ignorant to just write this lady off as "crazy". The kind of obsessive-compulsive you are used to hearing about is actually quite rare. OCD is usually a mild condition that most people never have diagnosed. If you knew just how many people are walking around every day with some mild disorder or other it would astonish you. As creepy or hard as it might sound to live with someone who has OCD, it's much harder to actually live with it. There are obviously things he likes about this lady, so cut her some slack.
Secondly, I could understand if he just didn't like the game and wanted to play something else. Everyone gets burned out at some point, but he never says that. Instead, he flat out states that he overreacted (ragequit) in a disagreement with someone he will never know in person and that he just doesn't mesh well with that guild. In the process of quitting, he's left his wife and long time best friend alone in a game where one of the primary draws is social interaction, and they are both upset by this. It all sounds very "taking my ball and going home". In the process, he has created an embarrassing and stressful situation for his wife which has got to be causing her all manner of grief, all because he couldn't get along with a *stranger*.
Look, membership in any given guild is contingent on how well your personality fits with the rest of the guild. It often does not work out. So you change guilds. These are not people you are building any lasting relationship with, they are people who share your hobby and that's about it. Real life relationships should always carry a bit more weight. This is something that makes her happy, so how about some compromise? How about, for instance, "I will play wow with you, but we have to find another guild/server"? It's not like he can never play other games, and considering that she is excited about the expansion and leveling characters, raiding won't even become important for a couple months.
It's selfishness, entitlement, and the inability to see something from another person's view that breaks relationships. It's not simply expecting your partner to join you in activities you like.
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Zoisite said on 2:13PM 11-18-2008
I'm more with you on this article, clutterskull. I don't think she sounds more crazy than your average OCD person - I'm married to one myself.
Is it so hard to believe that her excitement over him agreeing to play again is not so much based in her obsession with the game (obsession used lovingly, here), as it is that she'll get to play it with her husband again? I know I'd be pretty upset if my husband quit the game, he's my best friend and leveling-buddy; it's just not the same playing without him. And funny thing, my husband /gquit from my guild (he can't stand guild drama), and I stayed, but everyone knows that we're a package deal, I don't do new content without him, if we're playing together and a guildie wants me to heal, they invite him to go as well, since they know I won't leave him behind while I go off to run other stuff. Your guild is not the end-all be-all of WoW; if you can't get along where you are, find another guild - they're out there.
If I were in the author's wife's position, I'd probably react the same way. I'd be ecstatic to have my gaming buddy back! The writer's connotation is negative, because that's his point of view on a situation he doesn't like being in, for a game he no longer cares to play, and that's respectable... but she's no villian. After all, if you could have both your significant other and your favorite pasttime rolled into one, wouldn't you be excited about it too?
marla said on 4:54PM 11-19-2008
Actually, what struck me as slightly off was not the OCD behaviors touched on in the article, but the last portion in which he describes her "spastic" excitement over the upcoming expansion.
On a more personal note, I *am* someone with mild OCD. I have to check the door a couple times (sometimes more) in the morning before leaving for work if I'm having a bad morning; I reprint something countless times to get the exact layout on the page that appeals to me; I sometimes get up right as I'm falling asleep to double-check that all my stuff (wallet/wedding rings/etc) are where they are supposed to be. I would be the last person to mock her for her OCD tendancies :-)
What I should have elaborated on was *what* struck me as slightly off. Not the behaviors of the lady in question, but the way the writer portrays her - in particular the last section of the article (spastic laughter?). She does sound like she has a quirky personality along with her OCD, but I think she is over-exaggerated for some kind of stylistic affect (comic? dramatic?). The major thing I've learned from my parents (married over 30 years!) is that you *NEVER* talk about your spouse to others, even friends, in a way that portrays them in a bad light - even it's only slightly.
Michael Walbridge said on 12:25AM 11-19-2008
Comment on the actual piece alerted me to this linkage, thought I'd respond a little.
Good point on the wife description. I didn't do a good job describing her; she really did get that excited, and while it would look slightly strange to a complete stranger, she only lets excitement of that sort show in private or small company; should've left that part out I guess. It's really cute when you see it--I have no idea how to explain it.
As for bitterness, I was quite so at first, then I mellowed out as I recognized WAR has its flaws too; my intent was to show that there are sometimes things that matter more and that I should just mellow out.
I play other things too; enjoying Left 4 Dead a lot, and Northrend too (we'll see if it's the same at 80 though). And we did move to another server, back to Horde (which she likes more anyway), and are ditching that old guild.
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marla said on 1:17PM 11-19-2008
Yay, a thoughtful blogger who doesn't take comments personally! And yeah, if my husband made a post on some of the quirky (although cute) mannerisms I have in private/close company, I would be somewhat displeased.
Glad you are enjoying LK. I just got my CE yesterday. Luckily, the release was timed just as my husband got a bunch of new JRPGs and Banjo Kazooie to play, so we are in gaming heaven.