Massively

I was in a forum, it took us about a year to find out that one of the frequents had unfortunately passed away a year ago, his relatives didn't know we existed or how to contact us.

As odd as it may seem, even thought digital life in all its forms has penetrated our personal life, we still haven't become as used to it as we might think.

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We had a guildie that was killed in a motorcycle accident. He played WoW with us a looong time ago. We had moved on from that game, and just by pure happenstance another guildie was looking at the old Illidan Realm forums when he saw a post calling out our guild. Curious, since we no longer played the game, he clicked on the link. It turns out it was the RL brother of our member, trying to let us know what had happened. He didn't know our guild website, he didn't know his brother's passwords.

Of course we were floored, and several members contacted his family and offered our prayers and thoughts and our good memories of our friend.

I thought, if somebody hadn't been randomly looking at that forum, that day, we would have just thought he was one of those members that just drift away and we never hear from again.

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Hmmm.... The only people I'm at all close to in MMOs are people that I am also close to in real life. So, notification would not be an issue, really.

It might be nice if MMOs offered some kind of *secure* way for players to contact one another outside of the game, but I'm not sure how that would work -- maybe the way some forums allow players to contact one another (via the forum site)?

As for online subscriptions, yeah, it's something to consider. I wonder how, say, WoW, deals with players who set up subscriptions and then die without telling anyone their account information and/or passwords?

I guess that's just one more reason to be playing an F2P or something like Guild Wars, where subscriptions are not an issue.

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I'm probably a bit better qualified then most to opine on this. As it happens I spend much of my time caring for my terminally ill husband and my very elderly and excruciatingly crotchety father-in-law. Death, and what to do in the event of the death of loved ones, is something I spend a depressing amount of time contemplating.

Also, as it happens, I met my husband online, on an online BBS system called GEnie, which had its heyday in a time long, long ago, well before many of those reading this blog were even born. I know better then most that online relationships can be very important and are not to be trivialized.

For better or ill what is trivial are most of the kinds of relationships you're talking about. When the specter of death starts hanging around and you have to put more then a little thought into "What to do when..." in that "when ain't so far away" way, you realize that the aftermath of someone shedding their mortal coil is not a simple thing. Beyond the arraignments for their final farewell, there's a daunting mountain of people and organizations to notify and a long line of bureaucrats shoving rivers of paper your way and making endless demands of you, all at a time when you're least able to deal with the pressure.

In that environment frankly anyone whose response to not hearing from your loved one for months would be "Huh, whatever happened to X?" is too trivial to warrant much time.

For better or ill, that's as far as most in-game relationships rise.

If they don't have the means, will, or information necessary to find out what's going on if they don't hear from you, then they probably weren't important enough in your life to warrant overmuch consideration at its end.

It's not that your in-game friends are wholly unimportant or that someone shouldn't, at some point get around to jumping online and telling someone or send them a note, it's that when hit with the emotional, physical, and practical aspects of a loved one's death it's a near literal tsunami. To survive that with your sanity intact you have to prioritize.

In the real world an "MMO will" has such minor priority it's not really worth worrying too much over.

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I can't see this being anything else than a non-issue - one more pointless thing for us worrying westerners to worry about.

Oh gosh, who will inherit all my vanity pets?!

Please.

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This makes me think of the old wow video where they crash an in game funeral.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TSGUf1xbF8

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I have a group of 100 or so older online friends that have been together since the Counter-Strike days and over the years we have lost several members. In each case it was rather sudden but we were lucky enough to be a big enough part of their lives that their wives let us know what had happened.

It wasn't about getting their stuff...it was about finding out why they no longer showed up to group activities and being able to properly grieve for a lost friend.

If you have a Guild or group that you feel close to I'd suggest leaving some notes for loved ones about who to contact.

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I don't have a will yet but i do have instructions upon my death that gives account details about all the forums and games i play in to and letters to each individually.

My WoW account is being gifted to my guild for safe keeping, I'm my guilds mascot(I exemplify my guilds tennants, values etc and take it to an over the top level! :) )) And there will be a Funeral in zangarmarsh( my favorite zone ) for me and my characters.

I have a picture collage of my characters, memories and myself in RL for my funeral.

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